Cute/ Not Cute

Cute or not cute? 

I bought these monkey candleholders a few weeks ago from Target. They were on clearance so I thought I should get them because Ahmie has been so infatuated with monkey stuff. When I bought them home she looked at me with a mixed look. She looked at me like I brought home a beautifully arranged bouquet of dead rotting roses. She liked the gesture but was not sure if she really liked the candle holders. She said the monkeys looked kinda scary; especially when tea light candles are placed atop each candle holder then it will look like the monkey's head is on fire.

So I leave it up to you, are they cute or not cute, please comment.

Awww look at the wee bairn

Well during this past week Liam became 3 months old this Thursday. He has really grown and have changed in these (short/long) months. Choose one, both are real to me. It has been 3 short months and have seen him change so quickly. Equally valid, I can't believe that it has only been 3 months seeing him grow and change. It has felt like a short lifetime.

In 3 month's time Liam went from:

This


Liam at 1 day old 

To This


Liam at 3 months 3 days old 

As you can see he has changed very much in the 3 month's time. He has gotten much longer and heavier (at least 16 lbs probablly pushing 17).

I really cannot believe that Liam is 3 months old. Time has gone by it seems, very slowly. The past life of Ahmie and Garvin seems so far away, even the life of pregnant Ahmie and Garvin seems well a whole "lifetime" away. It seems so long ago that we had that hell first week dealing with Liam's Jaundice. The move seems so long ago even tho we have lived in the house on Tate for less then 2 months. I think time must seem slower because time slows when I am with the baby.

I think life will speed up again as Liam grows, but I think I'll take it slow while I can.

LicenSURE Fun

Well Tuesday's fortune cookie did not prove to be prophetic after all. Really it just turned out to be a note wrapped around a stale cookie. I heard from the vice principle of the school that I interviewed on Thursday. He was really good and kept in contact with me throughout the week. But I was passed on because I did not hold an Ohio teaching license. I sensed some lament in his voice probably because I was a superior candidate but I just did not have the credentials to teach at that time.

A note about licensure, many states have interstate agreements with other states to uphold a valid teacher licenses from other states. The idea of this is so that teachers may move more freely from state to state. Originally I became a teacher in 1999 out of pure luck.

After I graduated from Case Western Reserve University I had originally intended to move to Virginia because Ahmie wanted to go to Gallaudet University in Washington DC to pursue graduate studies relating to Advocacy for the Deaf community. I had originally wanted to pursue research positions at the NIH in Bethesda Maryland. However I had landed on the wrong side of the river and too far from both DC and Bethesda. Ahmie was temping at the time and I was working at a company called Mediatech. I was working in the manual labor filling cell growing fluids in sterile conditions, and other warehouse work. Ahmie heard from a coworker that the school systems around Northern Virginia were desperate for teachers. So I gave it a go. I did not get much of a chance to finish my application until early mid August of 99. However I was interview right away and was hired to teach at Douglass School a week before school started. I was given a provisional license and then I had 3 years to get the education coursework to lead up to a full license. Suffice to say I did that.

Anyway...

Two weeks earlier I had received a letter from the state saying that I could not qualify for a teaching license because I did not have Student Teaching experience. I talked to the teaching licensure rep about the fact that I had 5 years of successful teaching experience. She said sorry, but you need teaching experience and that they don't waive that requirement.

That knocked me out of loop for a week. HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO GET STUDENT TEACHING EXPERIENCE WHEN I WAS A REAL TEACHER FOR 5 YEARS AT THE SAME SCHOOL AND I GOT TENURE TOO. I resigned to myself that I would not be able to teach this year as a full time teacher. Because I was sure that I could be licensed somehow, and that this rejection for student teaching was a mistake. Then the following week I had the Interview. So on last Friday I took a day off work to call the state and heard in more detail that I was still not qualified to get a full teaching license because I did not have student teaching experience. I was however able to convince them to give me the name of a supervisor. So this mooring I called.

All weekend long I was dreading making this phone call.

So this morning I called the Center of Certification/Licensure
And spoke with a supervisor and she reassured me that I could possibly get a teaching license as long as my education course work was sufficient. That since I have taught under a full license the student teaching requirement should be waived. She told me to resend the licensee application attention to her, and she said that she would evaluate the application.

I was somewhat relived because it would have been impossible to be a student teacher and work with Northeast Care Center in my current capacity. Because student teaching was basically 5 months of unpaid teaching. All that time I would be at school for most of the work day and cannot work. If I need to take a few education classes to shore up my knowledge to align to Ohio's standards then that would be possible because I can take a few classes and still work full time. But of course the ideal circumstance is that I get my full license.

Let's hope for the best.

Chinese Lunch

I found out that a can sprayed out lubricant was what was the cause of the strange odor in my car. Unfortunately my lunch Cup o noodles were also in the trunk. I took one of the cup of noodles out of the car today and tried to eat it. The odor of the lubricant seeped into the Cup o noodles. So without anything else to eat I went and got lunch. Not wanting fast food take out, naturally I got some Chinese food. The lunch was mediocre at best.

The highlight of my lunch was a stale fortune cookie.

With integrity and consistency your credits are piling up.

Pondering upon that, I remembered the interview for Mid Park High School yesterday.

They asked this question:

What do you think is the most important traits you look for in a teacher?

I answered enthusiasm and consistency. Naturally I elaborated more during the interview.


I hope that this is a portent of good things to come.

Where do I live again?

We went around the east side of town this afternoon; we went to Microcenter, then to Half Price Books. Surprisingly we spent under 10$ there. Then we drove down towards Cleveland to Little Italy to visit Valentino's. This was a restaurant where I worked in the kitchen for a year and a half during college. I made a very good friend in Bill Lee who also worked there as the Pizza maker. He still works there and it was nice to see him again. It was the first time he saw Liam (he is one of the many people named William for whom he is named after).

It had been a busy night for him. With the athletes of the International Children's Games housed at the dorms at CWRU down the street. He was bogged down with orders for 25 pizzas and other kitchen orders when the restaurant opened for the night. It was nice to be back at Valentino's the familiar smell of dough sauce and the finished pizza. Anyway Bill treated us to dinner. We (as always) ordered a White Artichoke pizza, and their signature Hot Valentino sub. We tried to enjoy our dinner on the patio they have but the weather conspired against us.

It's weird while I was out and about today I keep getting a feeling that I'm seeing these stores but Think I am in Virginia. I'm like hey there is a Marc's (local discount store chain) I did not know they have ones in Virginia.
It is weird. I haven't moved back a whole month and it seems I am integrating and settling in Cleveland. But I guess we step back and regress in time abit.

I think this is something interesting about the human mind. In a universe that flows in one direction our minds can travel back to anytime in our memories. Like the smell of a familiar sent can bring back fond memories. We can immerse ourselves in or memories and catch up with the past in an instant. Sometimes the boundaries between now and yesterday blur and that is a strange feeling.

Blurring between the present and the past is weird enough I don't think I can comprehend blurring with the future.

Visitor from out of town

I spent 10 hours at work today. I did not normally mind being at work late. However I was mildly annoyed because our friend Sabrina was coming in from West Virginia. Since the group home that I work at has a policy that the residents are not to be left just alone with employees that are under 18 years of age, I had to stay while Brianne who is above 18 years of age was out taking a resident to visit her sister.

It was not really a problem but she forgot to give meds to the resident's sister and had to go back to deliver the meds. So it ended up to be past 8:30 before she returned. After which I stayed for a few minutes and then went home.

Sadly the resident's sister live around East Cleveland, which for those of you unfamiliar with Cleveland think poor minority neighborhood. The girls who work at the group home that took the resident to her sisters are suburban, white and female. I was somewhat annoyed by the story of their brush with the poor people and poor neighborhood, that they regaled to the other young girls working at the group home. Then again I grew up in the wrong side of the track so poor minority neighborhoods don't really bother me. Certainly I don't like to live in the "ghetto" as she put it. They are just people too. But I guess they don't have much in that aspect of life experience. Ahh to be young and ignorant.

Anyway...

It is really nice to see Sabrina again. She moved to West Virginia about 2 weeks after Liam was born. I am really happy to see her. She had Liam withdrawal so she wanted to visit last week but she was busy helping her friend Jaime give birth to her son Jacob Thomas last Friday. I hope we have some fun and have a chance to be together as friends.

Here is to a relatively dry (fingers crossed) and fun weekend.

POSITIVELY fun

I was injected with the PPD (purified protein deriveritive) TB test on Tuesday, I had the injection site examined and it looked like this


Suffice to say the nurse who read my red result sent me to the Urgent Care to get an X-ray to rule out active Tubercolosis.

I don't think I have Active TB but I am concerned that I may have Inactive TB.


Well I hope to find out more tomorrow

I am a working man again

After 6 wonderful weeks of being with Liam full time at home, I got a job!  However I did not get a teaching position (yet).  When I first moved into town about July 6 or so I got a call from NorthEast Care Center.  I had previously applied for a manager in training position, but was not selected for the interview.  I interviewed later that week, I was fully expecting the interview was for a Direct care position.  However from the start of the interview I sensed that I was not interviewing for the lower position. 
Like anyone who has tact, I pretended I knew what was going on until it was made very apparent to me that I was actually interviewing for the Manager in Training position.  After which I interviewed very well, and got the position. (yay!)
So for the past 2 weeks I have been training to fill paper work and generating reports! Ummm.
Why do I suddenly have an urge to watch Office Space? 
Anyway it's good to have a job eventho I am taking a massive pay cut.  I need insurance for Ahmie and Liam.  It's good to actually earn some money again.  The job is challenging.  It's good to have a backup when the largest school system in the area lays off 1400 teachers.

I never do anything easy.

Banking Fun

Well since the move we needed to set up a bank account so we can deposit checks and stuff.  Before the move Ahmie wanted us to use her old credit union I did not think too much of it at the time.  So 2 weeks ago we re-opened her bank account (she had an inactive account there).  Several things I did not like, 1.  they did not give us a checking account right away, 2.  they don't actually give money at the bank which was really annoying, 3.  there was only one location.  So Wednesday of last week we found out that we cannot have a checking account because our credit isn't good enough.   

So promptly we decided to get a bank account from a bank that could be found everywhere, from supermarkets, K marts and actual bank branches.  I was kinda livid over the fact that the credit union we used initially was so bad, I always thought that credit unions gave better service.  But I guess not all of them do. 

Suffice to say I'm much happier at the new bank. 

 

Good news from old friends

I called our my old friend Chris Frenz.  I have know him from way back from Boy Scouting.  He has been one of my old friends who I have been able to keep in touch with through the years.  Ahmie and I wanted to ask him and his wife Thao if they could be Godparents for Liam.  We were planning to ask them to come to Cleveland to be part of Liam's dedication ceremony.  Chris has kept track online with what has been going on with my life.  But he had news himself.

Chris told me that he and Thao are expecting and that she is 6 months pregnant. 

After the salutary congratulations, Chris and I (mostly I) talked about fatherhood, the excitement, the paternal instinct. 

I'm happy that Liam will have a (year of the) monkey cousin!

I am back

Between baby, tutoring, and moving, I have been kept very busy for the last past 2+ weeks.
I will endevor to share the cheers, and jeers that has happened over the past weeks of absence.

I have some photos to post of the new house but not of the move, more about that later.

A story of the last visit to a close friend, with pictures.

Some stories of farewell, and generiosity.

Some stories of tears,

and some stories of anger.



Oh what weeks have it been!

Which of the Endless do you think you most personify?

On the drive back from Cleveland (We talk a lot during long drives). I asked Ahmie which of the Endless from Neil Gaiman's Sandman series did she think most personifies her.

She said incredulously, Death (Because I knew the answer before I asked her and she went to prom as death). She explains that because of her indominatable spirit and sense of joy with life and the world.

I asked her, "Which one most personifies me?"

She said Destruction, because he chooses not to fit into the predefined role for him. Which I think is valid. I don't fit the mold for the typical Chinese American man.
Although I thought Dream most personified me. She said that he is way too moopy.

So here is my open question to you (my readers) which of the endless most personify you and why?

The Lost part 1

On our way back from Cleveland, Ahmie and I talked about our loves lost. This gave me an idea. I think I will make a missing friends section, and hope out of touch friends will see this and will get in touch.

The first person on this list is our friend Possum.


Possum 

She really is more of Ahmie's friend, but both of us have grown very fond of her and miss her very much.

Ahmie got to know Possum during high school with her literature magazine. Possum did not finish high school, she dropped out. Eventually several years later she did get her GED, and started going to Art School. However Possum never seemed to be able to finish anything she started aside from the GED though (she is so intelligent the GED was no challenge). I don't want to go into too much detail because there is much that I think is too personal to delve into.

Have you ever had a friend that for some reason really loved and you can't really put a finger on it? Possum is the personification of that type of friend. She really is greater then the sum of all of her parts. Her eyes are so big and round, the curve of her nose, the shape of her lips, each individually may not be the most beautiful by it self but all together creates a very stunning face.

Much like her face and physical beauty, she is also a beautiful person in the inside also. Her internal beauty has a haunting sadness to it. I do not know anyone who has lived more than she has. She dropped out; she traveled across the country, been homeless, has seen the best in people, and suffered from the worst of people. She can spin a tale full of beauty about the life experiences. She sees the world differently from most people, she truly believes in the best of people. This despite experiencing the worst from some people. There is a wild innocence about her, as if she really is a fairy in the real world.

In fact Ahmie and I tried to give her a chance to make a break from her old friends and surroundings. After a year of Art school in Pittsburgh, she dropped out much to the chagrin of her mother. Ahmie and I asked her to come live with us in Virginia. We laid some ground rules. Possum got a job right away.

Her current plan at the time was to become a Stylist and was planning to go to school in DC so she can work for Vidal Sassoon. Her immediate goal was to make enough money to purchase a car. She had a friend that promised to get her a VW bug for 800$. Once Possum made enough money she went back to Cleveland and gave to her friend the money. Not surprisingly, she did not get the aforementioned car.

Granted we had talked to her about this "deal." We tried our best to dissuade her from going through with this. But, she wanted to go through with it even though every bone of our bodies said she was going to get screwed.

She in so many ways is like a fairy, but mainly the real world and her world never really fully fit. She has gone about her life getting into dangerous situations, overdosing on drugs, being homeless, being stranded in the middle of nowhere. She can tell such magical tales about her life and tragedies. However the stories that she spins are neither sad nor depressing, there always lays a sense of beauty amidst the bad. Her innocence / naiveté can be infuriating because she does not seem to learn from what had happened to her. She sadly repeats similar mistakes.

She reminds me of Delirium of the endless. Possum has the same feral innocence that she has. Possum, much like Delirium must have suffered some tragedy to make her that way. Unfortunately Possum also have a strange ability of attracting like minded people (people who take drugs) where ever she goes.

When she was staying with us in Ashburn, she would often take long night walks. In fact I gave her one of my flashlights so she could be seen in the dark. For some reason she had gotten to meet some people through walking around at night and at work. These new friends were people who used drugs (mostly marijuana). Towards the end of the summer she had gone to live with these friends of hers. Eventually she returned to Cleveland, because she missed her friends in Cleveland.

In the final analysis Ahmie and I failed to do what we had set out to do, which was to give Possum a clean break. We sacrificed some of our privacy to have her live with us. She did abide by our house rules. However by the end of our summer together she had returned to her old patterns.

Friendships are much like the seasons of the year; true friends never break apart but rather go through cycles; Fall and Winter of distance and silence, Spring of blossoming and renewal, and Summer of heat and passion. No matter the distance, true friends never drift clean apart. Like a well loved and read book, true friendship could be picked up at anytime and continued.

So for friends! Let's spin around for another round!

Recap of Cleveland Trip

We finally left for Cleveland Thursday afternoon at about 5 pm; we got stuck in the Rout 15 traffic around Leesburg. Aside from Liam waking and screaming we stopped 3 times and we did not arrive at our mother in law's house until early Friday morning. Even with the early morning introduction I think Cindy (Ahmie's mom) instantly fell in love. We stayed awake talking for an hour or two more. I don't think I got to sleep until about 4-5 in the morning.

For this Cleveland trip we had 3 items in our itinerary.

1. Show Liam to family especially Cindy and Henry
2. Get a job
3. Get a place to live
4. Get a local phone

Friday

Friday started in a flurry of activity. I woke up and started calling school systems about open teacher positions. Most districts had finished hiring but I kept calling, I think I got two positions to follow up on.

Marvin (my younger brother) traveled from New York to see us in Cleveland. He originally intended to stay with us for a while but he got work as construction help from a long time friend. So his plan was to visit and leave Sunday morning. He arrived at the Greyhound Station at 2:30 in the afternoon. I was dropping off an application so Ahmie and I did not get to pick him up until about an hour later.

Greyhound stations tend be in parts of cities that have seen better days. On the same token many stations I have had the pleasure of stopping by also have seen better days, The Cleveland station was no exception. I walked in and my brother saw me and walked towards me. The first thing I noticed was his shorter hair, about 2-3 inches long and standing up, although hair styling products did not play a role in his hair. His hair reminded me of adult Gohan from Dragonball Z.

We walked into the light rain and stowed his bags into the trunk of the car. Marvin sat in the back seat and had a great view of Liam. Marvin marveled at how small Liam was. We drove around areas where we might want to live when we move back to Cleveland, mostly in the Old Brooklyn area (a working class area in Cleveland although all of Cleveland is working class neighborhoods).

We drove around for a while and got to see a bit of the Old Brooklyn area. We noticed some homes for rent. Including the "murder house", where a few weeks ago I think the exboyfriend stabbed to death the fiancé of the person who lived in the duplex.
Later that evening I looked online on cleveland.com to look for homes for rent.

Saturday

Saturday all of us groggily woke up and took our sweet time to get started. Ahmie started calling some of the properties that I and her mother highlighted. In fact we looked at one of the properties that day. A nice turn of the century Duplex, when I saw it I fell in love with it.

Later that afternoon we (Marvin, Ahmie, Liam and I) went to visit Ahmie's Father Henry. Ahmie's father remarried after divorcing Cindy when Ahmie was about two. Henry instantly fell in love with Liam much did Cindy and Marvin. He was wonderful and held him for a long time. Her half brother Matt was home and saw the baby but was not as interested. Henry's wife Carolyn saw the baby too but was not as enthused. However I think more of that was due to medical issues this week. We knew that Ahmie's Aunt, and Uncle and two of her cousins would barge in at any time, some how they knew we were visiting. Fortunately they were late and Henry had an opportunity to sit with Liam for a good half hour.

Sunday

We went to West Shore UU Church in the morning and Cindy drove Marvin to the bus station. I really thought Marvin had bonded with Liam, as little as he would like to admit it. Saturday night Marvin of his own volition went to Liam and looked at him and touched him. He also helped out alot when Liam was very fussy. He did more then I had expected him to do, which was wonderful.

We looked at one apartment in Old Brooklyn and later that evening I called several other classified ads.

Monday

We rested mostly on Monday. I started by following up the two teaching positions and another position.
Keep fingers crossed

Tuesday

This was by far the busiest day of the trip. Started the day with follow up phone calls to the school districts I sent letters to. Later Cindy and We went to Best Buy to set up a new cell phone account. It was great We got phones for all three of us and not only was it cheep but after the rebates we will get 200+ Dollars back over rebates that will make the phones free. Not to mention they will reimburse the first month's bill. That was great.

I dropped off my resume in North Olmstead; I hope something will come of all of my applications. We looked at several other properties. But we in the end choose the "murder house."

That house is great, granted the obvious problem. for 550$ a month we have a 2 bedroom 1 bath with kitchen, living room and a dining room, Most of the basement for storage with washer and drier, and a garage space. A good price for 1 unit in a duplex. We are close to the highway so it does not matter as much where I work. Well one major hurdle managed, we have a place to move to with space for all of Ahmie & My stuff.

Well 3 of 4 off the check list one to go.

Visit to Cleveland

Ahmie Liam and I will be going to Cleveland today and I will probably not update while I am out of town. However I will take some time to write everyday to record the memory.

So Wednesday night Ahmie called her Mom Cindy to arrange preparations for our visit. We will be staying at her apartment. Ahmie got to talking with her mom and her mom started to talk about concerns that her sister Janet has about our moving back.

Janet was concerned that Ahmie, Liam and I will live in Cindy's apartment and mooch off of her and that neither of us will get jobs and so on and on.

People on Ahmie's mother side of the family have not said things to our faces of their concerns about us. They don't have the guts. If Janet had expressed her concerns about us moving back to Cleveland she would get a facefull of knuckle sandwich.

That is so insulting. Ahmie's maternal grandfather shared the same sentiments, at Christmas time, but we can excuse that because he is (well) old and have not had a good track record of being kind, thoughtful or insightful.

I have been working hard to get my teaching certification in Ohio. I have already spent hundreds of dollars getting testing to get my certification. I did well in all of them. I know my responsibility, because I have to provide for my family. Fortunately I will have some money to tide us through for a few months. But I plan to look for and get a teaching position right away. In fact I will call the school districts again and try to arrange for a walk thought or an interview.

God I am so mad. Although I can understand that her precious (ahem) talented son has been unemployed since mid April. He has not been interested in getting a job and is mooching off of her.

For all of this I say boo hoo. Kick his ass to the curb, because he is 22 and can fend for himself. Time to fly or die.

Liam Update

Well Liam is 2 weeks old as of yesterday. After the flurry of action during the first week of life, we are settling into life as parents, we are in the firsts stage of development with Liam. He is going through his first growth spurt right now. He is a hungry fellow, and feeds well and regularly.

We went to the Pediatrician yesterday for his two week check up and he had surpassed his birth weight by 5 ozs. He now weighs 8lbs 10ozs. His head is 14 and 1/4 inches. He is 22 inches long (I think this may be due to difference in measurement and not all actual growth. The Pediatrician thinks Liam is growing fine since he has regained his birth weight (and more) feeding and is filling his diaper well and often.

Speaking of diapers Ahmie and I are in the habit of praising his bodily movements. I think this will fade. Since we don't (interrupted to feed Liam some bottled breast milk) have to be super vigilant about Liam's inputs and outputs anymore because the doctor is not concerned about Liam's Jaundice. We can now enjoy this regular and mandatory requirement of early parenting.

Liam Update

Well Liam is 2 weeks old as of yesterday. After the flurry of action during the first week of life, we are settling into life as parents, we are in the firsts stage of development with Liam. He is going through his first growth spurt right now. He is a hungry fellow, and feeds well and regularily.

We went to the Pediaterician yesterday for his two week check up and he had surpassed his birth weight by 5 ozs. He now weighs 8lbs 10ozs. His head is 14 and 1/4 inches. He is 22 inches long (I think this may be due to difference in measurement and not all actual growth. The Pediaterician thinks Liam is growing fine since he has regained his birth weight (and more) feeding and is filling his diaper well and often.

Speakng of diapers Ahmie and I are in the habit of praising his bodily movements. I think this will fade. Since we don't (interrupted to feed Liam some bottled breast milk)have to be super vigilient about Liam's imputs and outputs anymore because the doctor is not concerned about Liam's Jaundice. We can now enjoy this regular and mandatory requiremnet of early parenting.

Views from L' hotel de la Reston Hospital 

Liam in the Chamber 

Phototherapy mask