Thursday, September 27, 2007

Stages of Grief

1. Denial

I waited all weekend for the letter notifying my impending transfer but it did not arrive as I had hoped on Saturday. I grew more frustrated over my situation because I need the written validation. We went to church and a equinox party afterwards but still burning in the back of my mind was that I that I still am in limbo since I haven't seen the papers I cannot accept that I am being transferred.

2. Anger

I was pretty angry about the whole situation even though I did not receive any verification on Monday during the day. I was tired of the hold up.

I did not really go through the bargaining stage.

3. Depression

I got a fax of the letter Monday night which was open night for parents to see teachers. Mr. Laux handed me the letter I expressed appreciation for giving this to me. I understand that East Tech is not a special school, it was some time in the past with various programs but other schools now have special programs to draw more students and talented students. But Mr. Laux and other administrators go on to try to bring in exciting programs and partnerships to help revive this school that is bereft of its brightest students because of competition with magnet schools with special programs.

It was hard to deny I saw it on paper it said that I had to meet on Wednesday 9/26 at 2pm to discuss placement.

It was even more difficult because I could no longer deny that I am going to be moved. I had to talk to parents of good students and say to them, I had a great time teaching to (student) but I will not be her teacher much longer because I am being transferred.

It was a humiliating experience. I was glad that the parents showed sympathy and even understood as some of the parents have in the past been transferred involuntarily. It still made me feel dis empowered. It was exhausting telling all the parents that I met this.

4. Acceptance

I accepted that I was going to be transferred with this letter, but it was hard finding high school science positions in the transfer list. I knew that I will have a job but I accepted that I will most likely have a choice like this

You can choose between the 2nd circle of hell or the 1st circle of hell its your choice.
Since I have low seniority I expected that all the better schools or programs would have already chosen so I would probably get a job any job and like it. I spent parts of Tuesday talking with other teachers finding out which schools may be the better choice

Today Wednesday Sept 26th I accepted that this would be my final day I even bought donuts for my students as a good bye treat. I had closed up all student work and had already given a test to go over the final topics.

Mrs. Korb tells me during period 3-4 that the meetings today was postponed until Monday I looked at the Plain Dealer and found an article stating the same thing. I'm glad that the city newspaper knows more about my work situation then myself that is wonderfull (dripping with sarcasm)


1. Denial...

2 comments:

Ahmie said...

remember a little bargaining - "oh god please not middle school" or something to that effect... and i'm sure you aren't/won't be the only one, isn't that the whole point of monday's meeting?

glad you're taking some time to reflect, tho is it the reason you overslept this morning? you don't generally blog quickly so i'm guessing you were up past 1am typing.

liam's playing w/the leap pad, getting t to read words out of order, really kinda funny. now telling me "careful there the floor is wet"

bluesmasterelf said...

Leben ist Ă„nderung.